Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

That night.

“Kuhahahahahahat!”

In the shack called the Beggar’s Sect Subdivision, Jang-il hugged the coins and burst into mad laughter.

“Kuhahahat! To think that half a year’s operating expenses for the Beggar’s Sect Subdivision would drop in just half a day! A fortune god has come, a fortune god has come!”

Wei Yan-ho’s cheeks puffed up.

“Making a person into a beggar!”

“What’s good is good, isn’t it! Come on, eat, eat! Eat as much as you want!”

Jang-il made a big decision and stopped by a famous tavern in Kaifeng to buy lots of high-quality food.

It was a luxury he couldn’t normally even imagine, but there was no reason he couldn’t give this much reward to Wei Yan-ho, who had earned half a year’s operating expenses in just half a day.

“Ugh, this is all because of that damn senile old man!”

Wei Yan-ho ground his teeth.

He had lived for five years without being able to pluck even a single blade of grass to eat.

He had somehow maintained himself with Baek Muhan’s Internal Core, but Baek Muhan had literally only provided enough energy needed for training.

Thanks to that, after five years, Wei Yan-ho had become like a walking skeleton.

He wanted to protest that he wasn’t a beggar, but when Wei Yan-ho saw the mirror that Jang-il had brought, he lost his words. This was completely inexcusable.

To think that seeing his own face would make him want to cry!

“The second son of the great Guangdong Wei Family being a beggar! A beggar! Heuk! Mother! If mother knew about this, Guangdong would become a sea of tears.”

Jang-il laughed and patted Wei Yan-ho’s shoulder.

“Kuhahhat! Don’t be modest and just eat.”

“Sigh.”

Wei Yan-ho grumbled but inhaled the food that Jang-il had bought.

Food from the world that he was eating after five years was really so delicious it brought tears to his eyes.

Wei Yan-ho poured food into himself like a person with a hole in his stomach.

“…Eat a little slower.”

“Woo-woo-woo-ah-uh-woo.”

“…What did you say?”

“Ahm mer-gung-eh mang-ih-ih-ih mang-ah-uh.”

“Huh?”

“Ah!”

Wei Yan-ho swallowed the food in his mouth and opened his mouth.

“Don’t make me talk while I’m eating!”

“Sorry.”

Wei Yan-ho emptied the bowls like a storm, then grabbed his balloon-like swollen belly and lay down on the floor.

“Ah, now I feel like I might live.”

“…How long were you starving?”

“Five years?”

“People die if they starve for just one month.”

“I’m telling you it’s true.”

“Well, you probably wouldn’t look like that from starving for just a month or two.”

Jang-il smiled.

“Well, anyway, it’s good. You’re a fortune god who came to me!”

“I’m not doing it tomorrow.”

“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You made a lot of money, right?”

“……”

“If you made that much, now give me information.”

“Still, a promise is a promise…”

“After we do it until tomorrow, is it okay if I go around telling people that I’m not your father?”

“Uh…”

“I’m someone who’ll be leaving soon anyway. But you’re different since you have to keep begging here, right?”

Jang-il raised both hands and put on an act.

“Kuha! You’re quite smart for what I thought. Well, fine. It’s a shame, but since I earned half a year’s operating expenses, I’ll leave it at this much.”

Jang-il smacked his lips.

“So what do you want to know?”

“A list of famous Grand Scholars and where they live, plus their hobbies and specialties.”

“Well, that’s not difficult.”

“A list of famous blacksmiths and where they live, plus their hobbies and specialties.”

“Well, that too.”

“And famous…”

Besides that, dozens of other locations, hobbies, specialties, lifestyle habits, personalities, and such poured out of Wei Yan-ho’s mouth.

“All of that?”

“It’s not difficult, is it?”

“Each one isn’t too difficult… but the number is a bit…”

“A man shouldn’t say two things with one mouth, right?”

“Ugh.”

Jang-il scratched his head.

“I thought you were a fortune god, but you were a disaster god. Anyway, since I made a promise, I’ll find out for you. It’ll take some time, so come back after seven days and nights.”

At Jang-il’s kind explanation, Wei Yan-ho smiled broadly and answered.

“I have nowhere to go.”

“Huh?”

“I don’t have anything to do either, so well, I’ll wait here. Please find out quickly.”

“You’re going to wait here?”

“Is that not okay?”

“…No, there’s no reason it wouldn’t be okay. Then do that.”

And Jang-il regretted those words within just a few days.

“B-Branch Head!”

The next day, problems arose immediately.

“Why?”

“I-it’s a big problem.”

“What is?”

“Well! I think you need to come see!”

“What urgent business do these beggar bastards have that they’re making such a fuss? What’s going on?”

Jang-il casually followed the young beggar out.

Then he rubbed his eyes.

“Huh?”

The upper beggar who had helped him with begging yesterday was lying on a spread mat, and copper coins were piling up in front of him.

“That…”

Conversely, the Beggar’s Sect beggars who were begging on the opposite side were being scolded.

“You guys with perfectly good limbs!”

“Where do you guys who don’t even look like beggars get off trying to beg for a living! Get lost!”

Everything in the world is relative.

When a real Beggar Among Beggars appeared, the beggars who had been scraping by until now looked very clean and sturdy.

The kind kitchen auntie from Seonhwa Pavilion, who until yesterday had felt sorry for them and gave them at least cold rice, was now breaking their bowls with cold eyes.

How could people change so suddenly?

But they couldn’t be blamed.

Even to Jang-il’s eyes, the beggars next to Wei Yan-ho didn’t look like beggars. They looked like strong men who could grab and uproot that zelkova tree visible nearby with both hands.

“Ugh”

“…”

Jang-il shuddered at this situation.

“A real disaster god has latched onto us!”

“Because of that beggar bastard, we can’t beg. Everyone who has seen that beggar even once is breaking all our beggars’ bowls.”

“Even Gong-sang, who has no legs, went to beg and got beaten up and chased away!”

“Even Gong-sang…”

If even Gong-sang, the myth and legend of Kaifeng’s begging world, had his bowl broken, this was no ordinary serious matter.

At this rate, they would have to use yesterday’s operating expenses as living expenses.

For beggars to have to spend money to eat and live!

That would be earth-shattering, and before that, it was a matter of pride as Beggar’s Sect members.

“Ugh! This is a matter of pride! You’re beggars too! Don’t give up just because your bowls got broken a couple times, put some passion into begging!”

“It’s no use! Even the maiden from the persimmon tree house poured cold water on the beggars who went to beg!”

“T-the maiden from the persimmon tree house?”

Wasn’t she the most warm-hearted woman in Kaifeng!

She would cry even if the wind blew and leaves fell, and if she saw a passing dog limping, she would shed chicken-dropping tears and take it home to care for it – such a kind-hearted woman!

The pear blossom-like maiden that Jang-il had kept in a corner of his heart and cherished in his thoughts had poured cold water!

“What did she say?”

“She said if they lurked around one more time, next time she’d pour excrement water.”

“Ugh.”

Jang-il sent off his first love with a single tear.

“Branch Head We must somehow stop that beggar! At this rate, we’ll all starve to death!”

“Beggars starving to death in Kaifeng!”

It would be something for the history books.

Whether Jang-il was making a fuss or not, Wei Yan-ho leisurely lay down and scratched his belly. At first it was embarrassing and shameful, but once he actually tried it, this work suited Wei Yan-ho’s temperament very well.

Without doing anything, just lying around and taking a nap, money would pile up abundantly.

Then after properly collecting that money, if he slept again, money would pile up again.

If he had his way, he’d settle down like this and rake in money with a rake.

“Making money isn’t much either.”

At this rate, even before a month passed, he would have enough money to prepare a large mansion.

“Beggars really made money easily and comfortably.”

Wei Yan-ho was casually saying things that would make beggars cry bloody tears if they heard – beggars who barely managed to get a lump of cold rice to eat while covered in straw mats and getting frostbite on cold winter days.

Jang-il rushed at Wei Yan-ho.

“What are you doing!”

“Yes?”

“What are you doing!”

“Didn’t you tell me to learn begging? I’m just doing what I was told…”

“…Ugh, get up quickly!”

“I don’t want to.”

“Why don’t you want to! You said you’re not a beggar!”

Wei Yan-ho shared a new realization with Jang-il.

“Thinking about it, if you don’t have money, you’re a beggar – there’s no separate category of beggar. So I’m a beggar, I guess. I don’t have money, and I have nowhere to go…”

“You have money now!”

Jang-il was so desperate that informal speech came out naturally.

“Well, more money is always better.”

“At this rate, we’ll all starve to death. You must know what commercial ethics are! Don’t do this and come to my quarters! Aren’t you hungry?”

“Well, that’s true…”

“You have to eat while begging! At this rate, you’ll damage your body!”

“It’s fine. I’ll sleep a bit more first and then eat.”

“I-if you sleep on the main road like this, you’ll damage your body. Come to my shack. Wouldn’t it be more comfortable sleeping in cool shade!”

“I sleep well anywhere.”

“Sleeping anywhere! Haven’t you ever lain on a really comfortable bed?”

“There’s no bed there anyway. What bed would there be in a beggar’s den? There’s probably just some straw mats roughly laid out. I’ll just stay here.”

Jang-il became serious.

“No bed, what are you talking about! Hey, So-chu!”

“Yes! Branch Head!”

“A bed! Go buy a bed!”

“What? A bed?”

“Yes, a bed! The most expensive one, the softest one that’s so comfortable you absolutely can’t get up once you lie down!”

“But the money…”

“There’s money in my bag, so go buy it quickly! Move it to the shack immediately!”

“Yes, understood!”

“How about it? Now there’s a bed, isn’t there?”

Jang-il was desperate, but Wei Yan-ho was indifferent.

“Well, that’s true… but I’m also hungry. I’ll make money here and buy food to eat.”

“Food? Why would you buy food with your own money! If you’re in the shack, we’ll beg and offer it to you!”

“Still, since I’m a beginner beggar, it’s hard to live eating the cold rice received from begging.”

“Cold rice? Who dared do that? Which beggar bastard dares to give you cold rice! Gong-jin!”

“Yes, Branch Head!”

“Go to Chwiwol Pavilion and ask them to package the highest-grade food! First five servings! No, ten servings! The highest grade…”

“B-Branch Head, the money…”

“It’s in the bag, you beggar bastard!”

“Yes! Yes! Understood!”

Jang-il wiped his cold sweat and spoke to Wei Yan-ho. He felt like he was going to die from frustration.

“Come on, come to the shack quickly! Good food will be waiting when you get there.”

But Wei Yan-ho was in no hurry at all.

And unfortunately, Wei Yan-ho was the type who, once he put his back to the ground, couldn’t easily get his body up.

“Hmm… That’s bothersome.”

“Huh?”

“It’s kind of far to get there. It’s bothersome to get up too, so I’ll sleep first…”

“Jong-du!”

“Yes!”

“Go get a cart!”

“A cart, you mean?”

“We have to carry him! Go quickly and get a cart!”

“…Yes.”

“There, there, you don’t have to lift a finger!”

“Well, if that’s the case…”

Wei Yan-ho smiled broadly.

Jang-il, who felt that smile somehow seemed like an evil spirit’s smile, trembled.

A real disaster god had descended upon the land of Kaifeng.

***